The Bitch Is Back

Oh, hello. 

When the movie “Son of God” came out in February of 2014 I desperately missed having a blog (see Sarah Goes To Church for more info). All these ideas flooded my mind – marketable religion, capitalizing on Christianity, Jesus Christ lunchboxes, Noah’s Ark zoos, Creationism roller-coasters at New Testament Family Fun Theme Parks…the list went on. Gawd, I love wacky religious stuff!  I spent the next three days brainstorming ideas for a blog post I would never write and now most of those ideas are gone. These are just the leftovers. The solid gold ideas have vanished, because I never wrote them down.

I love to write things down – paint colors, music I want to download, ideas for baby names, all my favorite movies A-Z, grocery shopping lists, quotes I like, life goals, wedding guest lists, etc.  Thoughts in my head drift away like a makeshift raft down a river. I can’t hold on to a thought for longer than a minute or two these days. But, write a thought down, and, if carefully stored, say on the internet, it can last forever.  #ilovecommas

Now it’s been over a year since I've written anything more than a list. I've had a whole year of being a mom (I’ll explain later) and falling in love (later, I said) and traveling to interesting places and awkward stranger encounters and living in a house that’s falling apart and participating in an ever changing world of beauty and chaos and I didn't write a damn thing about any of it.  I can’t help but think of all the missed opportunities to immortalize moments.  All those ideas. All those creative quips. All those cheesy one liners. All those subtle sarcastic digs at ex-lovers. Gone. Gone. Gone.

It's a little sad. 

I miss writing. 

And not to be overly Aerosmith circa 1998 but I don't want to miss...another writing opportunity. 

So, I'm back. 

This time without limits. No longer will I be restricted to weekly church visits and my thoughts and feelings on organized religion. NOPE. This time I'm free as a bird and I'll be writing whatever the hell I please. 

It is now with great excitement that I present you with....a list. 

Things You Can Expect From SWAB:

1.Cheese, but this time with more wine and less crackers. Whatever the hell that means. 

2. A fuckload of fucking cursing. 

3. Bad grammar. Typos. Constant spelling mistakes. Odd punctuation. Over capitalization. An overall complete lack of respect for the English language. 

4. TMI

5. Minimal concern for your feelings. I wrote an entire year of blog posts about religion and only managed to piss off a handful of people. I played it too safe. I won't make that mistake this time. 

6. A melange of topics. That's right A MELANGE. (Though right now I can think of nothing)

7. Weekly posts. Every* Monday** you can expect and original piece of writing from yours truly.

(*there is no chance in hell I'm going to post EVERY week) 

(** sometimes blog posts will be released on days other than Monday)

Now you know. Come along or don't. 

Either way, I'll be writing...